Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Defining Family

There are more than 10 definitions of "family" in the dictionary. When you hear or see the word "family," who comes to mind? Husband, wife, partner? Kids? Mom, dad, & siblings? Grandparents? Friends? Pets? Who makes up your "family"? Does the thought of "family" make you feel warm & fuzzy, make you cringe, or make you feel indifferent? Is family defined by blood, love, attitude, values, or what?

My family is defined by blood and commitment. My blood family are those relatives whom I have known since the beginning of time - my daughter, granddaughter, parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, & cousins. My committed family consists of the people in my life whom I feel are genuinely committed to my happiness & success in life. They are the people whom I feel will be there for me no matter what. Sometimes the circles overlap & sometimes they don't.

After you've defined "family," think about how you honor those people & relationships in your life. For example, I heard a young lady, Amanda, on the phone with her younger sister, and my heart just melted. She showed such genuine concern & love for her sister that I knew, without having to ask, that her sister was incredibly important to her. My boyfriend, Joe, talks to his mother once or twice every day. He talks to his brother quite frequently as well. I, on the other hand, may talk to my mother once a quarter & find out about my brother's life on Facebook. I talk to my business partner, and high school best friend, almost every day. Is she my family? Yes. I take a whole week away from my private practice to volunteer at my cousin Rashan's Sporty Girls summer camp - and I wouldn't do that for anyone but her. Is she my family? Yes. 

So, everybody's "family" is different. Your family is made up of people who matter to you for whatever reason. You may interact with some family members more than others or differently than others but you probably love them all the same. Or do you? I challenge you to take a real look at who is in your family circle. There may be some people, though not blood relatives, who have your back no matter what. And you may have some relatives, although family by blood, who add nothing positive to your life. Your family can consist of whomever you want. What I want you to do is nurture those relationships because they are important for your mental and emotional well-being. Reach out to one or more of your family members today and tell them how much you love and care about them. Do it today!